I was taking a pic recently & ended up capturing the wrong edge of the intended picture. Doesn't matter what or why, but I found the accident photo compelling. My eye in the pic is looking up, looking to see if I'm holding the cell camera right...which I wasn't, but my eye looks normal. Not so sad. Not filled with tears & dread-I was so focused I was too busy to look like my soul felt. I was playing with my hair. Let me explain-I found a subject a day chart on the net & thought I'd try it-& that day's was descent...however you wanted to cover or interpret it. My hair has changed so much since I got sick & I was thinking about the descent of my hair from well to sick, though my hair itself is really healthy. I don't style it, blow dry it, put any product in it-so it is totally boring & natural. Anyway, thinking about the last time I had it cut professionally-I can't remember.myears. A decade maybe. In a few hours I'll leap out for the first time in years to call a pain clinic. Evidently we are moving this summer, & I need to call them to see if they can take me, what I need to do to start the ball rolling-all the stuff that terrifies the one's who feel a good doctor is far more important than most anything else in life. I'm so scared-what if they aren't accepting new patients, or what if they are not a good fit? I've even had dreams of calling them with disastrous results. For me the unknown used to be so exciting. Move to a new country in 6 weeks without knowing anyone or speaking their language? Can I come now? Start grad school in my 30's with no money? Sign me up! Snorkel the great Barrier Reef even though I'm scared of fish & sharks? I only live once! I was pretty brave. Really fearless. Now making a phone call that signals me leaving my beloved doctors is much scarier than getting on a plane to commit to a country I can't pronounce most of their words. & away I go.
Showing posts with label phone call. Show all posts
Showing posts with label phone call. Show all posts
Thursday, June 7, 2012
Time's humor
Labels:
anxiety,
bedhead hair,
brave,
chasoed mind,
chronic illness,
descent,
doctor offices,
fearless,
fibromyalgia,
full circle,
graduate school,
great barrier reef,
haircut,
hope,
interpretations,
moving,
pain worth a pic,
phone call,
plane,
real life
Monday, June 6, 2011
D+ Day
Today if I had been graded, on how I felt, what I accomplished, & what I didn't, a D+ would have been generous.
After working for an hour this morning, for what seemed like the 17th time, I failed to figure out how to hook up my mom's printer...again.
I didn't manage to return a phone call to a friend.
Still haven't hooked up 'skype' to meet my nephew, & he is almost a month old.
Could barely get out of bed at 8 PM.
Was back in bed at 11 PM.

My pain was really bad today, but at least yesterday was ok.
Managed to clean out Chai bunny's litter box, much to her bouncing excitement : )
Dad got home safely from his 50th high school reunion in Atlanta.
I posted this, so I get the '+' on that D.
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad
After working for an hour this morning, for what seemed like the 17th time, I failed to figure out how to hook up my mom's printer...again.
I didn't manage to return a phone call to a friend.
Still haven't hooked up 'skype' to meet my nephew, & he is almost a month old.
Could barely get out of bed at 8 PM.
Was back in bed at 11 PM.

My pain was really bad today, but at least yesterday was ok.
Managed to clean out Chai bunny's litter box, much to her bouncing excitement : )
Dad got home safely from his 50th high school reunion in Atlanta.
I posted this, so I get the '+' on that D.
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad
Location:My bed
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