#Listof3 Day 5-national health blog post month

 

Today is a very difficult day to write, as I'm going through a flare-meaning every pain is felt more, I am so exhausted I cannot keep my eyes open for days at a time, & it seems even my emotions hurt. As I sit here crying, I think of a list of 3 things I'm thankful for/inspired by/excited about. For me-in this dark, cold moment, I am inspired by these 3 things.

1-my darling, sweet, amazing house rabbit-Chai bunny. Her boundless joy for life inspires me to keep going. To raise my hand to continue petting her even though my hand is cramping & tells me I'll pay for overdoing it later. That even though she herself will cease to breathe, her happy joy will live on.

2-our newly discovered backyard turtle, who we named Pepper...life must seem so frustratingly slow at times. Even though he knows nothing else, surely he must notice how fast the birds in the yard hop around, rise up & fly 6 feet over, or swoop down to grab bread crumbs I leave out. He inspires me to accept myself-even when it seems everyone around me can fly so far & so very fast.

3-it sounds crazy but my paints inside the apps that I digitally paint with. Even though they look so beautiful in the little color wheel that gives so many choices-when I spread those watercolors out, it never ceases to surprise me a bit on how gorgeous they look even watered down. One stroke of color-even a muddy tone-conveys so much-even the darkest ones. I'm inspired just in how the colors themselves change-develop-& blossom on my digital screen. When you put one next to another how they either harmonize, or bring out the true colors when paired next to their complementary color, or even bring out the beautiful shades in the lighter colors on either side. We all play a part even if it is to support the other.

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Wasabi art

Just letting go & painting anything that comes out of my fingers, & using a lot of pointalism, here are some random paintings with the Wasabi Art app.

Mosaic eyes

the Hulk's peace sign

dots take flight

Prettying up the pills

 I get so sick of taking medicine, so I did a photo series making the ugly in my world...though I depend upon them for pain, sanity, etc...a bit prettier. 

 

 

 

 

 

Present skin

 I have a pinched nerve in my back, which after the fall a few weeks ago has been truly unbearable. Like I want to blow my head off or be put in a coma just so I won't be aware of the pain. A few minutes ago, I reached back to adjust the always present ice pack for inflammation that has filled my body like I'm a pod person, & when I did I barely grazed my skin. Not with a fingernail, not with anything sharp-just my finger barely touching my skin...& it felt like I had taken a lit match & held it there to burn & fester. I try & see my life like this pic-the left exciting, with beautiful colors & tons of pebbles representing events, Super Bowl parties, travel, drinks with friends. The right side is my now life-giant circles of bland colorless life.

 

Bruised art

While my internet was dead & I was going crazy...so isolating...I made some art out of my bruises. ;)

 

 

 

 

The great Pad & Quill app

I love the look of a moleskin notebook, with the elastic little band that keeps your secrets safe and sound, and have a gorgeous grosgrain ribbon bookmark in each little book. I have a lot of writing apps on my iPad, but ran across this one by 'Fabulously Retro' and the people behind 'Pad and Quill'. They have loads of different covers-all different fonts and colors-and they stack up like a little bookshelf on the screen. I've already started 4 notebooks since yesterday, and at 99 cents, it was a great stocking stuffer I stuffed to myself. ; )