Day 24- Mascot a go-go #HAWMC-WEGO

Our topic for today is to have a mascot for our illnesses or health focus. I'm choosing my own name...the reverted butterfly. Within a year or so into my becoming housebound & getting involved online, I discovered that many of the groups out there have butterflies as their logos or animal so to speak. I liked the thought, but as I had spent the last decade of my life living & teaching overseas, I felt the opposite. I was lucky enough to have lived in Indonesia, the Czech Republic, & had traveled in Australia, Asia, Brazil, etc. I felt like I had reverted back to the cocoon stage but was fully grown, so when I started my picture a day blog, I chose to refer to myself as a reverted butterfly. The important part I felt was to be honest-to paint a true picture, but also to be positive. I am trying to fight my way out of this new cocoon. Even if I never fully get out I'll never stop fighting, & to me that is my main message. I painted a picture of a purple butterfly, as fibro's color is purple, fighting to escape the cocoon stuck on a tree branch. You can see I have windows into my world from the cocoon, & damaged wings are sticking out, trying to stay a part of the world from this strange new wrapping of life.

 

 

'my dream day' WEGO #HAWMC day 14

Wow. Easy but really hard. I was so lucky & worked so hard tutoring in my off hours to work, live, & travel all over the world. I love having these memories, but I assure you sometimes they are more painful now that I'm alone & housebound. I am making my day re-visiting 3 amazing places, with J, my closest friend.

First we wake up in the coolest B&B in Tirendentes, Brazil-a tiny mountain mining town. We spent 2-3 days there about 8 years ago, & it is easily one of my alltime favorite places on earth. We will walk around, & I will be able to walk more than 3 minutes-I'll be able to keep up with him, & we will see parts of the town we missed before. Here is a link to a pic that looks identical to one of mine, somewhere in boxes in the garage.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/ricardobevilaqua/2271628610/in/photostream/

We will then magic carpet over to the Great Ocean Road in Australia, & visit the glow worm forest where you feel as if you are floating with the stars around you.

 

Then, around midnight we will jump over a few hours north of Brisbane, Australia, & go to the Mon Repos sea turtle sanctuary, where mother turtles come & lay their eggs, & then other clutches of nests erupt-the baby turtles tunneling up through the sand, down the beach, & out to sea. I got to see both one might under a full moon, & it honestly changed my life. Here's an amazing video I found...

http://vimeo.com/14136833

 

Mind on fire

This is the state of my Chaosed Mind. The scary, the part that misfires & causes me to seize up & fall, the part that causes me to lose so much strength in my hands (why I have been tested for MS twice in 4 years), the memories, the fears, the stress dreams, the fog, the over active pain center, the hopes, the wants, the needs, the creative, the stings, the grasps, the missed, the smiles, the music, the poetry

The Ring

I talked to a dear friend for over an hour tonight. I laughed so much that I cried after the call. Cried as I realized how long it had been-how much we had changed but picked up as hardly any time had gone by-discussed my future. What might be, or could be, or shouldn't be. Laughed at our past memories & stories we had lived & written. Afterwards my mind went wild, & I had to create something to quiet the possibilities in my head.

 

Sliced life

As many of my fellow sickities or those who know me know I often talk about the old me & this new me. More precisely, as it's been 5+ years, I think I should call it the now me. Today was a pretty decent day-no horrific stress dreams, pain more bearable for the first time in days, watching Justified & Southland & being amazed by such talent & incredible writing-dad finding my favorite veggie Lean Cuisine tofu strips & veggies in a tomato curry sauce, etc. Still though, I woke with a sense of doom. Seeing pics of friends & family on spring break trips thrilled me but made me long for the days of teaching ESL. One spring break I had 2 out of my 13 adult students in Little Rock who didn't have plans, so I took those 2 guys with me everywhere...out for drinks, the movies, anything-as seeing them so happy for their classmates going off on adventures yet sad to be left behind & alone crushed my heart for them. We had a blast, just doing normal things but getting to know them better-Ronaldo from Brazil, & BK from South Korea. BK opened up so much, & Ronaldo & I loved it as he & I were already good friends but seeing BK coming out of his shell was so liberating.

 

Today out in the garage, grabbing a club soda (or magic water as I lovingly refer to it) I saw some of my overseas things & student's gifts in a box, & it was the epitome of bittersweet. I don't know if I will ever fit the slices of my lives together well, but at least I can say on most days I try.

 

 

Memories of pictures

When I moved in with my parents 3 & 1/2 years ago, we just kept most of my things packed up & in the garage, still in boxes. I want to put all my pictures from my past travels on my sites, but cannot find the pictures...they aren't lost, but they aren't found either. I reversed a picture of me & recreated the pictures with my memories & impressions of specific times.



My 2nd year living in the Czech Republic it snowed more than it had in 50 years. I loved it-it was the winter wonderland I had always dreamed about, & I even enjoyed helping to shovel the waist deep snow.



In Melbourne, Australia, we went into the woods to a nature reserve/park off the Great Ocean Road & saw the glow worms. On a series of wooden walkways & bridges in total darkness the gow worms would glow & it looked like fireflies that instead of blinking stayed on solid. It was one of the coolest things I'd ever seen.



During a festival our school had for Halloween in Czech, we had a bonfire & told scary stories, dressed in costumes & drinking Czech beer.



Diving & swimming on the great barrier reef-the water & sky so blue it looked like a fake color it was so gorgeous. We saw a sea turtle & tons of multicolored fish...& thank god no sharks!



In a eucalyptus forest in Australia, we koala spotted loads of koala sitting in trees & it was one of the best things I've ever smelled!



A rainforest in Australia was one those places that is so perfect you try & outdo the postcard images.



On the edge of the ocean in Bali, Indonesia, drinking at a tiki bar lit up with twinkling lights.



One of the best days of my life-walking around the mining town of Ouro Preto, Brazil, choosing, designing, & getting my aquamarine ring.



Dancing & drinking in Rio de Janerio, Brazil, after having dinner & moving down a few doors away on the edge of the sea, with the nightlife creating an organic light show.



Touring ancient castle ruins around the city Liberec, Czech Republic, where I lived. I loved picturing which space would have been what room from the crumbling walls of amazing old structures.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Location:Imagination

An awfully good not so bad day

Here is part of my day chronicled in pics.



Riding to the dr at 7:43 AM.



Dad by my side as I was hunched over, trying not to cry-listening to Wye Oak, Sarah Jarosz, & others.



After dropping off prescriptions, I waited in the car while dad did some grocery shopping, & even surprised me with fried okra...only in the south can you procure that at 10 AM! Love fried ocra...


Entertaining myself while waiting for dad. Thank you iPod & great music!



Looking down & taking my mind to Brazil, the best vacation ever (where I got & designed this aquamarine ring).



Looking in the rearview mirror watching so I could unlock the car for dad, & my surprise okra!



Loving that having my rabbit reading pocket watch necklace, we could time & not get to the pharmacy to early. Dad said if the dr had some answers & got me on meds & it rained it would be a great day...didn't rain, but otherwise, even under the circumstances, he & I had a really good day. : )

Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Location:Dr, home